We’ve received a lot of letters about receding hairlines recently. A few weeks ago “Worried about Hair Loss” wrote to us complaining that his social life was suffering because he was going bald. A lot of people wrote to us imploring Worried not to be so…worried about hair loss.
Bendigo Baldy (never mind virility, what’s the link between baldness and alliteration?) reckons: “Turn it into an asset. Change your viewpoint and become proud of it. Your feelings are now just a viewpoint based on expectations that society and the media have sold you. Don’t waste your money on all of that hair replacement rubbish. Learn to be yourself, whoever you are, and get on with life … women (apart from the occasional silly one) will measure your worth by whether you are at ease with yourself and are fun to be with … short hair or a crew cut looks better than trying to compensate … use lots of sunscreen and wear a hat.”
Been There of Carlton says: “Less is more. Have a really short haircut for what’s left and stride out with pride. Anything else speeds up the angst.” An experienced hairdresser of St Kilda advises against hair replacement. “Cut your hair short if it suits you, and concentrate on being yourself.” (The general consensus seems to be that the bald-on-top, long-from-the-ears-down approach is right out.)
Hair is Not Gold of Melbourne goes further, and suggests that you shave your head entirely. “No one can ask you about losing it, and you can take comfort in knowing it is self-inflicted. I personally have a fetish for bald men. Right Said Fred is my favorite band and I drool over Adam Thompson from Chocolate Starfish (although he has a tad of hair at the back). Self-inflicted baldness is quite the fashion these days – trust me, I’m a teenager. My friends love bald men as well. Of course, you have to have the right-shaped head. I do realize that. Some bald men don’t have the greatest scalps.”
Who Gives A Flying Hairpiece, of North Carlton, took a survey of her six girlfriends, all agreeing that, “Bald was good, Bad attitudes bad”. Garnet of Melbourne says she couldn’t wait to reply to Worried, and also “Amythest” (who wrote to complain about her friend using Scalp Med). “I happen to be a nice, happy, fully haired early- twentysomething gal, and I must admit that I am usually always attracted to Les Hommes Sans Le Hair. I find baldness and those little, stubby-haired blokes INCREDIBLY sexy.”